Gonna be a Muscle Bear...

PICT1199.JPG

2007-09-29T23:25:00.001-07:00

PICT1199.JPG
Originally uploaded by desp1969

Just had to put this somewhere...yum!

No muscle here...

2007-07-27T08:41:00.000-07:00

So it has been quite a while since I posted anything in here, but since I'm probably the only person who read it... it doesn't matter. But now I need some place to vent.

I'm a little ticked off at "bigmuscle.com". After working out for a year, loosing about 50lbs, lifting four days a week, and building muscle... I finally decided to that I would create a profile there, as previously I didn't really consider myself to have enough muscle to deem a profile worth. But now, I'd like to think that some muscle now...

Apparently "Your photos and profile are not in the theme of the BigMuscle.com site so it was removed." Thus a profile about loosing fat and working on building big muscle is not appropriate for a "Big Muscle" site. They recommended I create a profile on "normalgay.com", not that I have anything against normal folks but I am working to get a bodybuilder's body and not just the norm.

I've visited the site quite often looking at almost every profile and there are quite a few folks are a lot scrawnier than me on there. So why is ok for a scrawny guy who is building muscle (aka bulking) to be on there but not somebody who an x-fat guy who is building muscle and loosing fat (aka cutting)??

Eye Candy

2007-01-04T20:54:00.000-08:00

So I'm back on the SGX routine this past week... the gym has definatly been a bit busier than usual, but nothing terrible compared to the horror stories I've read from other people. I did kinda get snippy about it on Tues, but I'm over that. Besides... with the new year comes new people, and when those people are cute... well. Ya there was a new kid in the gym this afternoon and yes he did distract me from my squats briefly. Total blue collar look... white tee, blue jeans, and worker boots. Adorable. Now I know the gym is not a good place to check out guys (unless it's in the Castro), but sometime you just can't help it.

Oh and did I mention purple shirt guy came back the other day too :-)

Hot inspiration of the day...

2006-12-28T12:40:00.000-08:00

So this guys is such an inspiration... He's lost 73 pounds to date. It never ceases to amaze me some of the transformations people go have gone thru.

One day I will look as hot as him.

"He's kind of cute..."

2006-11-06T09:46:00.000-08:00

2006-11-03_me 009
Originally uploaded by ironick.

So I was showing my friend Michael some photos from Halloween and then ended up on this photo which I took to post on BigMuscleBears.com which I was also showing him (he likes bears).

The funny thing is that when the photo came up he said... "Oh, he's kind of cute", then there was a pause, gasp as the hand covers the mouth... "Oh my god, thats you!" (as his face turns red)... he didn't recognize me... it was great. LOL. Guess I'm actually getting there regarding being a muscle bear ;-)

Ramble Ramble Ramble

2006-10-17T16:17:00.000-07:00

So it's been a while since I updated the blog and figured I'd ramble for a while...

First off, SGX-wise... update macros and continuing to hit the gym, however, not much visible progress :-/ Hopefully this week will yeild some results with the updated maros, in addition it will be the one month mark.

Work ramblings... We moved to a new building. Down-side: the gym is no longer just downstairs, I don't get to see hot purple shirt guy (who just recently re-appeared) or any of the other hot guys. Up-side: I'm in the same building and on the same floor as sales... and there appears to be a pre-requisit for being a male sales rep that you have to be in shape and good looking ;-)

Fourm ramblings... Found out the crazy-eyed guy form Folsom is actually a member of Tribe and has posted in "tribe" I joined. So I said hi ;-)

Tech ramblings... After several trips to Frys, I was finally successful in connecting my PC to my TV/Stereo last night so I can now watch the ~~porn~~ (I mean) movies I have on my computer ;-)

Halloween ramblings... Its Halloween time!! Already started on getting my Halloween decorations and props ready to go. Still have a ton to do before my party next week. I'm also working setting up some special effect stuff with my PC, TV, Stereo, and X-10.

Back on SGX and my modivation...

2006-09-29T14:26:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in a while on here, mainly because I took 3 weeks off and then had to deal with my apartment. But I'm finally back on SGX and actually following my macro's again. I just wanted to repeat a comment my friend made the other weekend... "Folsom really makes you want to goto the gym..." and my god did I agree. Yes, I like the men of the Folsom Street Fair.

Dispite a friends comment that I looked good my new rubber shirt, I know there is still room for improvment. And there will be improvment. Come next Folsom I want to wear my rubber and show off a years work of hard work. I want to be the one of the men that others come up to and say "Hot! Can I get a photo?"

17 weeks of SGX

2006-08-29T13:18:00.000-07:00

Well, I've finished Round 1 of SGX and all I can say is .... F**K YA!

I've gotten so many complements of the last few days, its been great. I can't wait to see how the family reacts. But while all these people are saying "Ben you look so good!", in the back of my head I keep hearing "just wait until they see me next summer..." ;-) I think I'm addicted!

2006-08-07T14:55:00.000-07:00

Just because I really haven't posted anything recently... so I remembered to ask the folks in the gym downstairs to get BF reading which was '23.7%'. Cool, while there is some doubt as to the accuracy of these readings it still show that I'm making progress. Don't know what's reasonable rate to expect, but this puts me down 1.6% in two weeks. I weighted in at 183.5 lbs on Sat morning. Woo hoo. I've got 3 more weeks to go. I just ran out of my supplements but the stuff I ordered last week would arrive tomorrow. I also ran my grill out of gas, and used up all my chicken... need to got shopping tonight!

Also over the weekend, at my rehearsal I had yet another person come up to me and say "Have you lost weight?... a lot of it?" :-D

And on a fun note, a friend found the following comic strip online and thought of me:
http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/uclickcomics/20060804/cx_ca_uc/ca20060804

Size what?

2006-07-31T09:20:00.000-07:00

Ok, motivational moment.... last Friday I was wearing size 36" waist shorts and a medium button up shirt at work, both fit comfortably!! The shorts where even a bit loose!!!! Woo Hoo! So I decided to got out shopping after the working out, as it was payday. The plan was to buy a pair of 34" shorts and say "I will fit into these," however when I got there I changed my mind... I decided to get 32" shorts which I would hang in my hallway until I could wear them. So when I got home, just for kicks, I decided to try them on... They fit me like size 36" use to, meaning quiet snug, but I could actually put them on. I couldn't believe it. Fuck Ya! I NEVER thought I would wear size 32". So instead of "I will fit into these," it's now "I will look GOOD in these."

Free ballin...

2006-07-28T15:00:00.000-07:00

Ok, so today is the 2nd time I've recently forgotten to put underwear in my gym bag... so I'm free ballin today. It actually doesn't feel half bad ;-)

Bodybuilding - A Lifestyle, Not A Pastime

2006-07-25T08:25:00.000-07:00

So in my spare time at work (meaning, when I take a break to stay sane), I've started to read a bunch fo articles from bodybuilding.com, including one title "Bodybuilding - A Lifestyle, Not A Pastime." And as reflected by my last entry, I totally agreee.

One thing the article says is that "Lifting weights is the easy part," meaning its what you do outside of the gym that can transform your body. That's when it hit me just how much I have put into "getting in shape" and how much I've gotten out of it time compare to all my failed attempts in the past. Currently I have six meals a day and each meal (for the most part) has exact pre-measured ratios of protein, carbs, and fat. I've never had a problem with working out, it was the eating that always failed me in the past. I would say "I just need to get active and then work on eating better" and never really got the second part under control. The difference in my results is incredible.

Along the same lines, I started to notice other people's habits. Like a co-worker of mine who I see down in the gym several times a week, the other day she was walking back to her desk with some sugar waffers from the vending machine. I thought to myself, that use to be me with my daily trip to the vending machines for a Pepsi and a Twix...

All I have to say... That AIN'T me any more.

Obsessed?

2006-07-19T09:07:00.000-07:00

So I posted my 10 week update in the Vizual X-cellence forums (SwoleCat's site) and got a lot of compliments and encouragement. I also showed my progress photos to a few co-workers who have also been working out and/or dieting to same effect. I have to say, it definitely made me feel good.

So, the other day I was thinking about a quote I once read...

"Obsessed is just a word the lazy use to describe the dedicated."

...the fact that I'm in the gym 4-5 days a week which equates to hitting the gym 8-9 times a week because I usually go twice, cardio in the morning and weights after work (4 out of the 5 days). I have read most of the articles in the past three months editions of Men's Health, Men's Fitness, and Men's Journal. I pre-cook most of my meals, measure them, my protein shakes, and supplements into little baggies....

Ya, I'd say I'm bordering on obsessed. And you know what?

I Like It!

Week #10 on SGX

2006-07-16T15:41:00.000-07:00

So last week was #10 of SGX and despite a lot of bumps, I did manage to make some progress. I only dropped 1lbs according to the scale, however, looking at my photos between week #9 and #10 there is quite a difference. Also since it's a nice even number I decided to do a composite progess photos showing week #1, #5, and #10. It great to see that I'm actually making progress. I still have quite a ways to go before I'd call myself a muscle bear, but I'm definatly on the way!

I've got another 5 weeks to go before I finish up what I'm calling Round #1 of SGX. As, the beginning of Sept I will be heading back east to visit friends and family. I can't wait to see their reaction. The last time the family saw me was back on Oct 2005 and I was probably around 215 then. When I first moved to CA I was 220.

I would love to get to the point were my stomach dosn't stick out any more. I mean I know I'm not gonna get a 6 pack in a month, but if I can get rid of most of the love handles I would LOVE IT. We shall see...

Drum Corps Drum Corps Drum Corps...

2006-07-06T15:21:00.000-07:00

[Testing Email Bloger] This past week marked the start of my 3rd month on SGX and the start of drum corps hell month...

Last Friday, this Friday, and next Friday are drum corps shows which prevent me from hitting the gym. Thus I've been doing a M-Th workout with no rest day (typically Wed). I also skipped morning cardio Fri, Sat, Sun, and Tue. I've been a little sleep deprived, so Tues was sleeping in until 8AM.

Also because it's show weekend my schedule is whacked so trying to follow a meal plan is rough. I ended up eating out, Saturday (at a show), Sunday evening (after rehearsal, this was my planned cheat meal), and Tues afternoon (lunch after performing in a 4th of July parade). Now Saturday was the only REALLY BAD day, as I had hot dogs at the show and Wendy's after the show. Sunday and Tues where both at Red Robin, Burger & Greens on Sun and Chicken & Salad on Tues... so not that bad. Kept it low-carb, but I'm sure the fat was higher than it should have been.

But with all that said... I managed not to really screwing up my progress.

As for this weekend... we will see. It's my corps trip to LA and while I do have an actual pre-planned schedule... Chaos is quickly becoming the theme for this year in the Renegades. The plan is to hit the grocery store after work to pick-up some steak for breakfast, go home... grill the steak and some chicken up and prepare all the food that I need for Fri, Sat, and Sun. Then pack. Then clean. Then bed. The get on a bus at 6AM Fri morning...

Party Ben

2006-07-03T09:09:00.000-07:00

So last Thursday I went out to dinner for a friend's birthday, then we all went over to the bar for some karaoke and drinking. Well, in my case... drinking water. And I'll tell you what, I was bouncing around and talking more than I think I've ever done (even when drunk). Even introducing myself to people... It was great! One of my friends even commented on it as I'm usually really reserved when I go out and mainly just hangout/talk with folks a I already know.

I'm really diggin' this whole more energy and confidence thing.

Embracing the Big

2006-06-29T14:37:00.000-07:00

Big Worshiper

63% for working out
74% for loving muscles!

You like to hit the weights, and be noticed for your efforts.

You like to notice the guys who work-out too.

The love of muscle Test @ OK Cupid

So the other day, being as we're back in the rut of routine query work here at work, I decided to go surfing form some online quizzes to add to my mySpace profile. One of the ones I came across was "The Love of Muscle Test" (right) and I think it's pretty accurate.

Since I've started working out I've noticed that I do definitely have an affinity for well built men and have started expressing it more. Just the other day I had a friend ask me what my "type" was and for the first time flat out said that I like big guys (not tall, but built). Not that I don't find other guys attractive, however a cute face is ... well ... just cute, not hot.

The other side of the test reflects the fact while I do want to lose weight (a.k.a. fat), I don't want to be skinny. I want to big and built myself. Most people say they want an "athletic" body, however, I'm pretty sure I want a little more muscle than the athletic look.

As for getting to the point where I get "noticed" for my efforts... I'm coming up on the 2 month mark of SGX, so I hopefully get some progress pics and status up over the weekend or come Monday. I've got 2 more months to go before I head back home, I'm really hopping that by sticking to the program and hitting the weights hard that I'll make some good progress before then. I would absolutely love for my college buds to go "HOLY SHIT... who the hell are you and what did you do with Ben??" (ok, so its unlikely I'll make THAT much progress, but one can strive ;-)

Feelin good...

2006-06-23T10:47:00.000-07:00

So I don't know if it is the exercising or all the supplements I'm taking, but I've noticed that I'm starting to be a bit more outgoing and confident. I've definatly been more talkative than I usually am, and a bit more forthcoming and even a bit forward aswell.

Whatever it is, I like where this is going ;-)

SGX Update - Week #7

2006-06-21T09:41:00.000-07:00

Alrighty... Way over due posting. I'm now in week #8 of SGX and doing much better than when I started. I've gotten much better at the meal planning (when I have time) and doing great at the workouts & cardio. I've still got some challenges, like drum corps and lack of sleep, but I'm working through them. So here is my progress:

Start: 210lbs
Current: 195lbs

Oh Ya... It so nice to see that I actually do have biceps! Now if I can just find my abs...

I've still got ways to go before I would say that I've got the meal planning and eating side of the program down, but I'm getting there. So far I'm very happy with the program. SC has been great and the forums have really helped me learn a thing or two. I'd say I'm well on my way to being the muscle bear I want to be.

SGX Wk #2

2006-05-08T09:50:00.000-07:00

So at the end of last week, I was ready to stop SGX for a week to re-collect myself and get orgainzed. I definatly did not have enought time to prepare for the program properly so my meals were way off, but at least I kept to the workout schedule.

On the recommendation of the guy that created SGX, I am going to continue doing it and workout the meals as I go. I should be less busy this week and will definatly have time next weekend to plan and shop. So I will continue with the workouts (as I did with cardio this morning) and supplements and meals... At least half my meals are correct as they are protein shakes. Its just the other half I need to work out.

SGX Wk #1, Day #1

2006-05-02T10:06:00.000-07:00

Due to a busy weekend I didn't start the program yesterday as I didn't finish preperation (i.e. shopping)... so that was last night and today marks the start of SGX. Yesterday I went around and bought the supplements and whey and what not that I would need to do the program, in addition to actual food.

My alarm went off at 6am, hit snooze once, was up at 6:07am... took my moring supplements, packed up my breakfast and lunch... was at work just before 7am to start my cardio workout. 45min on the treadmill at a brisk walk (no jogging/running). Then shower and upstairs to clock in for work and heat up my breakfast (Meal #1).

So far so good, I was actually not tired this morning and felt good after the cardio. I will be trying my first protein shake with flax seed oil here shortly for Meal #2...

Looking forward to the workout after work.

New plan of attack... SGX

2006-04-21T10:14:00.000-07:00

So I did my fitness eval at the fitness center downstairs and really didn't get much out of it. So I've decided to break down and actually try a personal program designed by a professional. After reading a much of post on forums.johnstonefitness.com, I've decided to try out a program several folks on there have done called SwoleGenix (SGX) dispite the cost. I figure this is something I really want and I'm tired of running in circles, compared to personal trainers it actually not that expensive.

I should have my program sent to me over the weekend, but I won't actually get around to reviewing it until next week due to rehearsal. Next week will be spend customizing the program and getting ready with the plan of actually starting on Monday May 1st.

Time off...

2006-04-16T21:23:00.000-07:00

In spite of the fact that my wrist is still a little jacked, I'm gonna try and start working out in the onsite gym at my new office. I haven't worked out in about a month because I did something to my wrist which prevented me from working with my dumbells and also pushups. I still need to get to a doctor as to get it checked out as it's not really getting any better.

But I really want to start working out again. As bad as it is, unless I'm working out I really can't keep my eating under control, I find I'm more prone to bad eating when I'm not trying being physical. So we shall see, the up side is I really haven't gained much weight since I stopped working out.

P90 - Week 3

2006-03-21T08:34:00.000-08:00

So I'm on week three of P90 and not seeing much progress which is a little disappointing but not surprising considering how bad I've been doing with the diet side of the process. I was very tempted by the vending machine this morning but resisted and had a banana instead.

I also missed a set of workouts last week.. :-( ... due to being social. On the bright side, on of my new neighbors/friend is talking about getting in shape as well. So hopefully we can help keep each other motivated.

On the upside (since I haven't updated this in a while) the photos I took of week two of P90, I'm pretty sure I can see a bit more bicep action going on which is awesome. I haven't taken any pictures for this week yet. Maybe tonight the workout.

Why?

2006-03-10T00:26:00.000-08:00

(repost of my private Livejournal entry)
Why can't I ever stick to eating health?? Why do I always feel the need to spend money as soon as I get it??

So yesterday I got my security deposit back from Jeanne, we got the entire amount back so it was a good size check. Which I went to the ATM to deposit. Afterwards, I decided I wanted to eat... so I went to a sushi bar down the street from the bank, bear in mind that I had some chilli at home for dinner earlier.

Then again today... I went out before work and ended up getting pizza for lunch instead of eating the tuna and bag-o-spinach I have at home. Dinner? Why not Pop Eye's? Sure.

So really fail at the W.I.W.M. thing as I tend to skip over the question. Grrrrrrrrrrrr.....

Why the fuck can't I stay focused and modivated. After the fact, I'm always like "why did I just do that" but by then it's too late. Case in point... Tues... Eric called and ask me if I wanted to goto the movies. Instead of eating at home and then going out, we went to Bennigan's and I had a Cuban Monte Christo. After the first bit I could feel my arteries cloggng and thought "why do I always get this, I never finish it, I always end up thinking it's way to heavy..."

At least, so far, I'm sticking to the working out. And both the cardio and weights none the less! Now lets just see how I do next week. Typical in the past... Week 1 = great, Weekend 1 = drum corp, Week 2 = "I need to recover for camp", Week 3 = "What week 3?"

THIS CAN NOT HAPPEN THIS TIME!!

THIS WILL NOT HAPPEN THIS TIME!!

I want a body like this, and I will get it!